I'm full of comfortable bad habits.

Not to worry...its monitored by Sheriff poop!

Upside down items are cool with me

I have toes: Dory has stinky.

I feel like the only Curly at an all-Moe convention.

Your lips say "yes" but your cuticles speak volumes!

No, my dog is fine -- it was my grandma who died...

Let's ditch the cha cha's and get down to business!

Ahh. Self directed sarcasm is not my specialty.

When the bra doesn't fit right, it's time to start eating different...

Heard on the street in NY:
"So how did the whole shit go down?"

He gets haldol, but only for "Dinner Plate Eyes"

That family gets a group discount for anti-depressants.

I just feel better when it's on.

Irony is my specialty

Any more pearls on poop?

I have some donging experience.

It's always not a good day.

It's terrible when your tonsils stick together!

Consider me the un-Cindy

Eeew - liquid fly

Paging and Bottom To

It doesn't feel so good when the "huh's" turn against you...

Thank you for not putting your cat up my nose...

Kittens are easy to get.....livers not so much.

I have so much duct tape on my mouth right now.

And now if you'll excuse me, I 'm about to terminate.

Life is a cabaret, not a buffet.

Hi Westies (arf arf!)

Without the love, it's just a bowl of meat

I'm not the smoothest talker.

 

...but I'm a really good watcher!

We actually check pants......

How time flies...when you're old

I really thought this last dip would be it!

He was as kooky as a loon.

I need to be Helga for a minute.

You could eat there but there's no food.

Truth is the new hatespeech.

I poked her, but she wouldn't move!

Please be mindful when exiting the building that you do not walk into a waterfall......

Make that haldol!

I am floating today.

Suck it up, cupcake!

I don't have an outside voice!

I'll bring him fur.

I don't strive to be Keith.

Her ankles are getting fuzzy.

You're making me seasick.

Anything for a friend with a gastric bleed.

You've got a green chin.